32 Funny Football Jokes for Kids

A collection of funny football jokes for kids.

Football is one of the most popular sports in the United States. While it’s a serious game, that doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun with it.

Below we share a list of funny football jokes for kids. These clean humored jokes can be shared anywhere. Send them with your child to tell at school. Include one in their lunch to read for some midday humor.

If you are a teacher, feel free to share them with the children in the classroom.

Football Jokes for Kids

A picture of a football player and a dog with the joke "Why didn't the dog want to play football?"

1. Why didn’t the dog want to play football?

It was a boxer!

2. Which insect didn’t play well in the goal?

The fumble bee!

3. When fish play football, who is the captain?

The team’s kipper!

A picture of a football player and a squirrel with the joke "How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?"

4. How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball, it drives them nuts!

5. Why should you be careful playing against a team of big cats?

They might be cheetahs!

6. Why aren’t football stadiums built in outer space?

Because there is no atmosphere!

A picture of two football players with the joke "Which quarterback can jump higher than a crossbar?"

7. Which quarterback can jump higher than a crossbar?

All of them, a crossbar can’t jump!

8. Why did the football player hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music!

9. What tea do football players drink?


A picture of three football players with the joke on the picture saying "where do footballers dance?"

10. Where do footballers dance?

At a footBALL!

11. What did the bumble bee runningback say after he scored a touchdown?

Hive scored!

12. What are Brazilian football fans called?

Brazil nuts!

Two football players with the joke "What lights up a football stadium?"

13. What lights up a football stadium?

A football match!

14. How do hens encourage their football teams?

They egg them on!

15. Why do grasshoppers not go to many football games?

They prefer cricket games!

16. Why did the chicken get sent off?

For persistent fowl play!

17. Why can’t football players wear glasses on the field?

Because it’s a contact sport

18. What happens to football players if they become blind?

They become referees

19. When should football players wear armor?

When they play a knight game

20. What did the football said to the punter?

I get a kick out of you

21. What do football players wear on Halloween?

Face masks

22. Which state should the Tampa bay buccaneers move to?


23. Why did the super star running back could NOT listen to music?

Because he broke all the records

24. Where do quarterbacks go to dance?

Foot Balls

25. What is the most sneaky play in football?

The quarterback sneak

26. Why using a payphone in the old days was like playing football?

Because if you didn’t get your quarter back you hit the receiver

27. What is the favorite ice cream flavor of football players?

Any Given Sunday

28. Which football player wear the biggest helmet?

The one with the biggest head

29. How do football player deal with their problems?

They tackle them head-on

30. What did the player say to the flight attended when boarding?

Put me in, coach!

31. Which insect doesn’t know how to play football?

The fumble bee

32. Why did the football left the team?

He was tired of being kicked around

In Summary

There you have it, 16 hilarious football jokes for kids. Which one was your favorite? Were you able to get some laughs from your child? Please share these jokes with others.