50 Funny Dinosaur Jokes and Puns

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Let’s talk dinosaur jokes!

Maybe the family just watched Jurassic Park or your child is discussing dinosaurs in the classroom. These are perfect situations to work in some dinosaur humor.

Q: What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?
A: Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

Q: Why did the dinosaur get in the bed?
A: Because he was tired!

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: It was the chicken’s day off.

Receptionist: Doctor, there’s an invisible dinosaur in the waiting room.
Doctor: Tell her I can’t see her!

Q: What do you call a fossil that doesn’t ever want to work?
A: Lazy bones!

Q: What did the dinosaur say after the car crash?
A: I’msosaurus

Q: What do you call a tyrannosaurus that talks and talks and talks?
A: A dinobore!

Q: What was T. rex’s favorite number?
A: Eight! (ate).

Q: Why are there old dinosaur bones in the museum?
A: Because they can’t afford new ones!

Q: Is it true that a dinosaur won’t attack if you hold a tree branch?
A: That depends on how fast you carry it!

John: I lost my pet dinosaur.
Ron: Why don’t you put an ad in the newspaper?
John: What good would that do, she can’t read!

Q: Why did the dinosaurs go extinct?
A: Because they wouldn’t take a bath!

Q: What makes more noise than a dinosaur?
A: Two dinosaurs!

Q: What do you call a Stegosaurus with carrots in its ears?
A: Anything you want, it can’t hear you!

Q: What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
A: Try-Try-Try-ceratops!

Q: Which dinosaur slept all day?
A: The dino-snore!

Q: What do you say when you meet a two-headed dinosaur?
A: Hello, hello!

Q: What do you do if you find a blue Ichthyosaur?
A: Cheer him up!

Q: Did the dinosaur take a bath?
A: Why, is there one missing?

Q: What’s the best way to talk to a Tyrannosaur?
A: Long distance!

Q: What kind of dinosaur can you ride in a rodeo?
A: A Bronco-saurus!

Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with fireworks?

Q: Which type of dinosaur could jump higher than a house?
A: Any kind! A house can’t jump!

Q: What does a giant Tyrannosaurus eat?
A: Anything she wants!

Q: Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red?
A: So she could hide in the strawberry patch!

Q: What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed?
A: Find somewhere else to sleep!

Q: Do you know how long dinosaurs should be fed?
A: Exactly the same as short dinosaurs !

Q: When can three giant dinosaurs get under an umbrella and not get wet?
A: When it’s not raining!

Q: Where was the dinosaur when the sun went down?
A: In the dark!

Q: What’s as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?
A: Her shadow!

Q: What do you get when a dinosaur sneezes?
A: Out of the way!

Q: What do you get if you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
A: Jurassic Pork!

Q: How do you know if there’s a dinosaur in your refrigerator?
A: Look for footprints in the pizza!

Q: What happened when the dinosaur took the train home?
A: She had to bring it back!

Q: Why was the dinosaur afraid of the ocean?
A: Because there was something fishy about it!

Q: What do you call a Stegoceras with one leg?
A: Eileen (I lean)!

Q: What made the dinosaur’s car stop?
A: A flat Tire-annosaurus !

Q: What type of tool does a prehistoric reptile carpenter use?
A: A dino-saw !

Q: Who makes the best prehistoric reptile clothes?
A: A dino-sewer!

Q: Which dinosaurs were the best policemen?
A: Tricera-cops!

Q: What do you call a dinosaur who is elected to Congress?
A: Rep. Tile!

Q: Where did Velociraptor buy things?
A: At a dino-store!

Q: What is an Iguanodon’s favorite playground toy?
A: A dino-see-saur!

Q: How much fur can you get from a dinosaur ?
A: As fur as you can get!

Q: Why do dinosaurs eat raw meat?
A: Because they don’t know how to cook!

Q: What did dinosaurs have that no others animals ever had?
A: Baby dinosaurs!

Q: How many dinosaurs can fit in an empty box ?
A: One. After that, the box isn’t empty anymore!

Q: How can you tell if there’s a dinosaur in the refrigerator ?
A: The door won’t close!

Q: Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation?
A: To the dino-shore!

Johnny: Why did the Triceratops cross the road?
Billy: He didn’t, the chicken crossed the road.
Johnny: Well, why did the chicken cross the road?
Billy: To get away from the Triceratops

What did you think? Did you find them humorous? Did the person on the receiving end get a chuckle? Some of my favorite jokes are actually the ones that just fall flat and you just get that look of bewilderment.